Mary Kathleen Trdan-Schmidt

On Christmas Eve, 2024 we lost someone that you meet once in a lifetime. God broke the mold when he made her. Mary Kathleen Trdan-Schmidt, her friends called her “Kay”, was born in Minneapolis, Minnesota on May 25, 1954 the only daughter from Edward Arthur Trdan and Mary Margaret Creighton. Edward and Mary met while Edward was on deployment in Ireland serving in the Navy during World War Two. Kay inherited her precision and patriotism from her Dad and her love of all things Irish from her mom. Kay is survived by her brothers Michael, John, Edward, and Phillip and her two sons, Adam and Jonathan and his wife Tham. Her husband Charles “Chuck” Henry Schmidt passed away in 2017 from a long hard battle with cancer. Kay was by his side for every day of it. She spent her childhood in Minneapolis, she attended Our Lady of Victory Catholic School grades 1-8, where she excelled as long as she could see the chalkboard. With a name like Trdan, she was alphabetical in the back of the class and glasses were expensive. The stretches of her neighborhood were nothing to her if she had her bike. She'd bike dozens of miles in Summer’s heat and Winters snow, but she did develop a lifetime hatred for snow. Science always cultivated her curiosity, she was always thirsty for knowledge. She watched the moon landings with fascination and explained how jet propulsion worked for her class. Eventually she would go on to homeschool her sons and both graduated college and one works as an aerospace engineer so something must have gone right. She graduated from Torino Grace High School in 1972. She became a golden gopher and graduated from University of Minnesota with a bachelor’s in food

science in 1976. With only a machinist salary, Mary and Edward kept a tight household but contributed what little financially they could to their children. What this strict fiscal household did was impress upon Kay the value of time and money. So she started working as soon as she could. Her first job was as a carhop, where she would meet Michelle. Michelle and her brother John would soon become an item. Then she picked up a job at a retirement community where in her own words “They feed me.” It was her next job at the Bureau of Engraving-Art Instruction School that would change her life forever. It would be when she would meet Elaine Sturkoll who would introduce her to her first love of her life, collies. All her life, She loved animals big and small. Her first pet was a canary, because in Mary’s house “she wouldn’t take care of a dog!”. The many champions of Creighton Cliff collies would prove Kay certainly could. On one of her first adventures with Elaine, She drove Elaine across the state to have her bitch bred, and for compensation for that transport Kay got a puppy. Angel is the first collie to capture my mom’s love for the breed. Since that moment in 1974 our family has not been without the love of a dog. Not just any dog, a collie. Through the love of the breed she had made lasting and loving friendships, Elaine, Barbara, Linda, Moe, I am looking to you. Collies were breed for the harsh winds and cold rains of Scotland. Their two coats shed constantly and require extensive care and was a deterrent for those who would be less than worthy of Kay’s love. One brave challenger to the arena of Kay’s affection was “Chuck” Charles Henry Schmidt (11-24-1946 to 04-28-2017). The two weren’t afraid of manure and mud, and met on a dairy farm. Chuck was establishing himself as a legacy dairyman, and Kay was a Vet’s assistant. Those moments of mucky animal husbandry fostered the flame that would last a lifetime. Chuck showed up on Elridge Drive, wearing a yellow polyester suit and through the peephole my mom was questioning how her life would turn out if she opened the door. Well, she did. Lt. Commander Jonathan, his lovely wife Tham and his younger brother Adam were the result of that bravery.

Their dates ranged from building dog houses together to interstate dog shows, The two exchanged vows at a quaint church in Minnesota with a horse drawn carriage and surrey on top.  Kay loved fairy tales. Ask any newlywed’s how life is. It’s not easy and yet, through a collaborative effort with Chuck's endeavors and Kay’s dutiful planning our childhood was without want. Expanding from a small geodesic dome bought on credit to SoCal beach realty. The two were the ying to each other’s yang. The two were the stars of the “chuck and kay show” and were each other's strength. Saint Chuck’s patience and understanding were my Mom's rock in trying times from Stock Market crashes to broken plumbing. Meanwhile, Mom’s attention to detail helped him keep track of the little things like Child Support for his first two children Steve and Susan, and yes Adam’s recital is tonight. Communication, yeah sure, if it was “Kay’s” way or oops i just so happened to buy a bavarian motorwerks z3. Regardless of the inadequacies created by not saying how you feel, the two collaborated to have a life full of adventure and care. Yes, the motorhome broke down at some parts, yes it was my dad’s fault for not changing the spark plugs on the generator, but it didn't matter because it was with her man, her children, and she got to see the wonder of Yellowstone, the Grand Canyon, Rushmore. Together they ranged across the United States from sleepy campground to sea to shiny sea. She made things happen in her own way. The one luxury she allowed herself was her hair. After looking for many years, she finally found a master barber and she was a regular customer for decades. She spent countless hours sharing her life with her friend Tommy but mostly bragging about her boys. When Tommy found out one of these boys was single … Well Kay and him worked together to introduce Tham to Jonathan. The small fact that Tham was on the other side of the world was just a small detail to overcome. In her own way was such a manner of care and loving that few got in the way of it. She literally brightens everyone’s day by being herself, whether that was being Elaine’s Mail Accessory bag to Keila’s assistant dance choreographer handing out detailed flashcards of the classes’ activity.

Her care with money always meant it was there for that needed it. Every Christmas, the Salvation Army and the nuns of Saint Scholastica would receive a contribution as steady as the Northern Star, and when friends and family were down, they knew who to turn to. Even though she led a full life, it's difficult to lose someone so suddenly. She loved Christmas and was decorating her home when God called her to heaven. One of the decorations going down so that a 1979 wreath could go up, was a picture of one of the champion sires of Creightoncliff greatest star “Turbo”. This was a gift from her friend Linda, and under the photo was a quote. “Success may be how we measure our accomplishments, but friends and family are how we measure our lives” and by every metric, she broke the mold.

As we close a chapter of our lives, we are entering a new one, a life without Kay. She will never be far from our thoughts if we can do three things.

One, Christmas must be celebrated with full vigor. Watch all the fluffy warm feeling hallmark movies you can, give enthusiastically of your time and if you can, gifts, and decorate. Every Merry Christmas you say Think of Kay.

Two, exercise a little restraint in terms of finances. I have calendars to prove how responsible she was. One of her favorite saving strategies was a “Buy Nothing Day.” So when it’s not the holidays and we all need a reminder of Kay. just think “Did I have a Buy Nothing Day?”

Third, my mom loved the Irish Goodbye. Days before her sudden health decline, my mom was checking up on her prayer list and reached out to a dear friend named Kathy Steel. Kathy has had a lot going on recently and enjoyed venting to my mom. I am pretty sure my mom vented to Kathy too so it wasn’t completely selfless. Before they said goodbye to each other, my mom said something all too profound. She said “No matter how hard life can be, we must never give up on our dreams.” When the dust has settled and our hearts can live again, I want everyone to draw a MAP “My Action Plan.” So we all dream again and can thank Kay.

Thank you everyone for being here. I’ll let my mom’s words guide us from here.

“The most important gift that a person can give you is their time.” -Mary Kathleen “Kay” Trdan-Schmidt 02-05-2024.